I rather forget....
I cried so hard, shaking my head fast and hard, forcing the memory to get out but I fail to do so. Without my notebook to distract me, the painful memories came to me.
I remember the betrayal I gave to my kind, all of the pain, the terror, the death, and my mother....she did made this scarf for me. To stay warm in the winter time and what did I do?
I left her behind when she refused to run with me. To stay alive.
She told me "It was pointless to run. Once the humans destroy their own home, life will grow and during that time it is nothing but struggle. It is better to die now then face a life time of pain."
But I didn't want to die. So I left her, desperately looking for some sort of help. My time was running out and I was scared.
Finally I did found someone, a sprit, a weak one due to the human's massive production on the planet thus, destroying the planet's wildlife. This sprit offer to help me, but for a price.
My memories, my abilities, my race... in order to live after doomsday.
I didn't hesitate and said yes. The Spirt asked me once again if I was willing to give up these things to live. It told me I would just be a wandering empty soul in dead world, with no real purpose in life.
I said: "Its better then giving up."
Boom. Everything went white.
How could I have remember this? ALL OF THIS?! I thought I lost them but here they are in my head once again! Those memories!! My mother!! I want to forget...I want this guilt to be gone...
....I just want to forget.....
"Hmm?" I look up and saw Snippy looking down at me with the same angry expression he always hold on his mask.
"Captain said we have to, ugh...wrap up winter..." Snippy spoke with an irritated voice.
"Okay." I said and follow him.
Funny, I felt better. Much better actually. That guilt feeling was gone. What was I sad about? I remember being sad about something but I don't remember anymore. Then again, should I be worry? I feel happy now. Whatever it was that I was thinking about must have been depressing, yeah not worth thinking about it now. It's in the past.
"Snippy...I suddenly feel lighter then air again."
Romantically Apocalyptic (c)Alexiuss